port-a-potty problem

Our remodeling has taken much longer than we expected and the number of contractors we hired over the course of this project requested a port-a-potty in front of the flat so they wouldn't have to make the one block trek to the Starbucks or Lucky's to use the restrooms.

My brother found a portable toilet renting company in the bay area and had one placed next to our front tree several months ago. Other than the student renters on our block who have tossed their cigarette butts, soda cans and other garbage in there, we've been fortunate that toilet vandalism hasn't occurred, until yesterday.

We were notified by the port-a-potty "cleaner" that there was a lock on the door and he wasn't able to clean it. We have never locked it before so my brother called all the contractors who worked for us and asked them about it. No one knew. Was this a prank by one of the student renters in the neighborhood? Who would create such an inconvenience for us? My brother checked it out. The lock was brand new.

My family and I started speculating while watching "Fringe", the sci-fi drama, and ideas about conspiracies filled our heads. Who's against our remodel? Are the neighbors planning to gang up on us? What if they break into the flat by way of the garage doors and set the place on fire? We all got riled up, shouting ensued and I threatened to put a note on every neighbor's front door to sleuth out who put that lock on our port-a-potty.

So, my dad had enough. He woke up early this morning, drove to the flat, and with a hack saw and large pliers since liquid nitrogen wasn't readily available, broke the lock, and found a life's worth of a homeless person's belongings. Piles of stuff in heavy duty garbage bags. He tossed the bags to the side and put our own padlock on the door. Then he called and angrily told me what he did and that I better not "act like some vigilante" and harass the neighbors tonight. Okay, Dad. I won't start gang warfare in my neighborhood now that the port-a-potty problem was solved.